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This video is quite funny and the delivery is very good. It is, however, not something that would probably go over very well for a toast that you may give. But this video does give you some clues on the structure of a toast. There is a beginning a middle and an end and the length is perfect.

The toasts are one of the areas where we look to obtain sound bites and can often involve some time shifting to set the stage for the wedding day. We try to suggest to our clients that they ask their friends or family to prepare ahead of time for their toast that they will deliver at the reception. Sometimes we hear “Oh my brother or my Dad is not the sentimental type”. It doesn’t have to be mushy stuff but certainly they have some memories that mean something to them or certain events that they love to recall. There are always touchpoints in peoples lives that they can pull from to include in their toasts and these are very important. We had a Best Man recently tell a funny story of a baseball game they played when they were younger. He said in that speech that it’s those simple funny memories that they will always remember. Have fun with the toast but also be respectful and authentic. Below are 10 tips to think about as you prepare for the honor of being asked to give a toast.

1. PREPARE SOME NOTES: Just start writing some thoughts down on paper or your computer. If it’s your friend, think about how you met, funny stories, why you remained friends, what you admire about the person, personality qualities, etc. The Father of the Bride can certainly pull from many memories. Did you ever remember thinking of this day when she was a child? What do you admire about her? What do you admire about the Groom? If the Groom asked your permission to marry your daughter, recall that day. What went through your mind at the time?

2. DELIVER THE SPEECH IN A MANNER YOU ARE COMFORTABLE: Don’t try and deliver a speech that you feel you can’t pull off, because you won’t and it will show. Be yourself.

3. IT’S NORMAL TO BE NERVOUS: Don’t let this be a barrier for you. It really is ok to be nervous and most people are. If you are nervous it’s ok to let people know this. Just letting people know you are nervous is actually a calming effect for yourself. Once you get started, you will be fine. The more prepared you are the less nervous you will be.

4. DON’T CONSUME TOO MUCH ALCOHOL BEFORE THE TOAST: The video above is funny but if you are too drunk to give a speech, it’s going to embarrass the couple and later you.

5. BE RESPECTFUL OF THE COUPLE AND GUESTS: It’s ok to have fun but remember this is one of the most important days of this couple’s lives and a lot of money has been spent. If you think something you are planning to say or do, run it by someone for another opinion.

6. KEEP THE TOAST OR SPEECH AT A REASONABLE LENGTH: You don’t want the toast to drag on. It should be delivered at a pace so that people don’t get bored but not too short that it seems unsincere. Anything over 5 min is going to probably cause people to drift.

7. HAVE THE DJ OR BAND ANNOUNCE THE TOASTS: There is nothing worse than someone trying to give a heartfelt toast and the guests are talking and moving about. Have the master of ceremonies give a 5 minute and then a 2 minute warning.

8. SPEECH SHOULD HAVE A BEGINNING MIDDLE AND END: Watch a movie trailer and see how they get a message across in such a short amount of time. Some of your favorite movies that kept your interest had a distinct beginning, middle and end. Construct your toast that way. This will help you with pacing and delivery as well.

9. STAY IN THE LIGHT: Receptions are notorious for being dark environments but if there is available light, stay in the light so that the couple and guests can see you. This is also going to benefit the photographer and videographer in documenting this important part of the day. Face the couple when you are referring to them and it’s ok to turn to the audience when telling a story about the Bride or Groom. Try not to pace back and forth.

10. PRACTICE YOUR TOAST: You spent all this time thinking about what you are going to say and you captured some notes, you need to practice it so you are comfortable with it. Practice at least a couple of times. Do this with someone or by yourself.

Relax and have fun with it.

Each wedding that we film, we approach it by looking for the unique textures, small and large that make up the personality of the wedding.  We have filmed a growing number of weddings where the Bride and Groom have written their own vows.  On one occasion they both wrote them on the morning of their wedding day.   From a storytelling perspective, we love this.  We had one couple write their own vows and they never shared what each had written until they read them to each other  in front of a captive audience.  It was amazing how certain aspects of the vows mirrored each other.   We like personalized vows because it takes the expectation away from your guests.  Many of your guests have attended weddings where the traditional vows were exchanged, but once they hear a deviation from the norm, they seem to be more attentive.  Writing your own vows is certainly not for everyone  but it is well worth considering and adds another layer of a personal memorable touch.

Writing Your Vows Tips by Style Me Pretty
1. When it comes to writing your vows, keep it simple. Your guests and your partner will appreciate it that much more.

2. Some churches do not allow for custom vows. Make sure to check with your officiant before you get your heart set.

3. A great way to include your own vows without the stress of starting from scratch, is to personalize the more traditional vows. A handwritten letter to your partner, read aloud, is a great way to do this.

4. Make sure you are comfortable with the tone of your vows. If joking around is a part of your everyday life, it will feel seamless tucked inside your vows. If you are more subdued, skip the jokes and just say what you feel.

5. If you get stuck when coming up with what you want to say, look to old stories, photographs and memories with your partner. Allow the words to come from those moments.
Northernlight Filmworks